Couple Therapy: What creates separateness in a relationship?
The damage caused by the participants’ unconscious expectations and demands at a more exact level of understanding: the re-creation of negative unconscious patterns that lead to separateness and are repeated in the relationship.
Sometimes this expectation comes from the Family Fields, from the memories inserted in these fields, be it from traumas in the system (specifically from relationships), or entanglements (fidelity to the previous system, compensations). In Couples Therapy, both the negative interactions of the personal ego need to be transmuted, as well as the systemic issues. The latter has greater depth and locking force and are more difficult to be seen.
In the partnerships Love at Second sight, as Bert Hellinger calls it, (I love you with your differences) heals himself of the systemic entanglements since I love that which guides you and I love that which guides me! Again I subscribe to what comes from my partner’s system with gratitude. I love the origin that brought him to this partnership.